The ever elusive ability to have Faith

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. Hebrews 11:1

I have been listening to Wayne Grudem's video series on the basics of the Christian
faith; it is an enjoyable overview of the terms a Christian encounters and works through.
In a recent discussion of sanctification, he mentioned a long-time Christian woman who
was terminal. When questioned about her faith that she would soon be in the presence
of Jesus, she replied that she hoped so. Wayne saw this as very sad, as an indication that
her faith was not full.

I, on the other hand, see this as very human. Faith, when one speaks of a Christian's
journey, is TRUST in God, in Jesus, in the Gospel.... I could go on. Having assurance
is something that I believe grows as we grow into more mature followers of Christ; however,
I am not willing to forget a very important characteristic of we people... we are people.

That means we carry with us a certain amount of doubt and inability to completely 
trust in something we cannot physically reach out and touch. I am not implying that
faith doesn't grow, that we do not become much more comfortable about trusting in
Jesus as we read God's word and continue our walk. I am certain that were I to be
told tomorrow that I was soon to rest, I would have many things to tie together and
would feel a certain amount of anticipation because I fully believe in the saving power
of Jesus and the grace of our God. I also, in my most honest look ahead, am sure that I
will respond honestly in a way very similar to the woman discussed above.... with HOPE,
with heartfelt joy, with excitement, with a certain amount of sadness that I will be
leaving this wonderful life God has provided for me.... and also, with a degree of
doubt.

Not doubt in Jesus!  Not doubt in God! Not doubt in the gospel message of salvation
through the work on the cross... doubt because I am a human being... incapable of
total trust and faith.

I know and believe that God will understand me because, after all, He was the one
who created me.

All praise and glory be to God the Father!